Okay, something lighthearted here. What

Okay, something lighthearted here. What would happen if you, say, translated “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer” into Spanish…Then translated the Spanish into English? Hmmmmmmm…..

{insert harp music here}

Here’s the original lyrics, c. 1969, Northern Songs

Joan was quizzical, studied pataphysical
Science in the home
Late nights all alone with a test-tube
Ohh-oh-oh-oh…
Maxwell Edison majoring in medicine
Calls her on the phone
“Can I take you out to the pictures
Joa-oa-oa-oan?”
But as she’s getting ready to go
A knock comes on the door…
Bang, bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Came down upon her head
Bang, bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Made sure that she was dead
Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again
Teacher gets annoyed
Wishing to avoid an unpleasant sce-e-e-ene
She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away
So he waits behind
Writing 50 times “I must not be so-o-o-oo…”
But when she turns her back on the boy
He creeps up from behind
Bang, bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Came down upon her head
Bang, bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Made sure that she was dead
P.C. Thirty-One said “we caught a dirty one”
Maxwell stands alone
Painting testimonial pictures ohh-oh-oh-oh
Rose and Valerie screaming from the gallery
Say he must go free (Maxwell must go free)
The judge does not agree and he tells them so-o-o-oo
But as the words are leaving his lips
A noise comes from behind
Bang, bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Came down upon his head
Bang, Bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer
Made sure that he was dead

And here’s the English-to-Spanish-back-to-English translation:

Joan was quizzical
pataphysical science, studied in the last nights of the home
everything only with a test-tube…
Ohh-oh-oh-ohh-oh-oh-oh
Maxwell Edison majoring in medicine
the flame on the telephone
“can I takes to him towards it go to the Joa-oa-joa-oa-oa-oan-oan pictures”

But as she is being able ready to go
the blows of A come in the door…

The explosion, explosion,
hammer of silver of maxwell came down on its main
explosion, explosion,
hammer of silver of maxwell made sure that it was dead

posteriora part in games of maxwell of the school again
that the professor of the idiot obtains again
bothered that wishing to avoid sce-e-e-sce-e-e-ene disagreeable
she says the maximum to remain when she has left the class
so it waits for behind
the writing 50 times “I do not have to be under-or-or-oo…”
But when it behind gives return him in the boy
who it crawls for above of behind

the explosion, explosion,
the hammer of silver of maxwell
came down on her explosion main,
explosion, the hammer of silver of maxwell
made sure that it was dead

P.C. Thirty-One
this “we took to the dirty pictures testimonial
ohh-oh-oh-ohh-oh-oh-oh Rose of one one”
of maxwell single painting of the supports
and Valerie that shouts of the gallery
it says it must freely go (maxwell must go freely)
the judge does not agree
and he says to them that under-or-or-oo
but as the words are going away their lips
noise of A comes behind from the

explosion, explosion,
hammer of silver of maxwell
came down on its main
explosion, explosion,
hammer of silver of maxwell
made sure that it was dead

Alrighty then. My brain officially hurts and I am a candidate for a migraine from figuring out where the heck the line breaks should go.

Okay

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